Are You Addicted to Love?
Are You Addicted to Love?
Have you ever met someone that you had an immediate connection with, jumped into a whirlwind romance only to see it end almost as quickly as it started? You do not understand; you felt that you immediately know what to say and not to say around them, what makes them laugh, and other things. Then it slowly dawns on you that he or she was a lot like your ex, and most of the exes before him or her.
Some people seem to be drawn to all the wrong individuals when it comes to dating and relationships. They cannot seem to help themselves, and this is pretty soul-destroying because until they break their negative patterns in dating, they will never have a truly successful relationship. Instead, they will continue to date one wrong person after another, mistaking mis-guided comfort for love or attraction.
So what do you do about that if you happen to fall into this category? First of all, you must identify the types of people that you have been falling victim to and figure out why they are all so wrong for you. For instance, if you are drawn to the bad boy or girl type, it may be due to a part of you that loves to rebel against things.
You may also subconsciously want to be mistreated in some way. There may also be a part of you that wants to ‘help’ or change these people into loving and respectful partners. What you need to recognise is that these people are never going to change and see things your way. They like being the way they are and will not change for anyone. Therefore, the person that needs to change is you.
If you find the negative pattern of dating that you seem to keep following, you can start changing it into something useful and a way to find happiness.
To start breaking through your negative dating pattern, no matter what it is, then the first thing you need to do is figure out why the kind of person that you are attracted to always turn out to be bad news for you. When you are able to get that part settled in your head, then you can set about figuring out the type of man or woman that will be good for you. Look closely at what you need from a partner long term. Then start trying to meet men that fit the criteria.
Even if you have to force yourself, stay away from those former individuals that have always been so bad for you. Understand that if you are ever going to be happy, you must extricate yourself from the negative dating patterns that you have enmeshed yourself in, no matter what they may be. It is not impossible to get it all worked out. If you cannot do it on your own, then you may want to get some professional help with it in the form of a therapist.
If you find yourself repeating any of negative patterns over and over again, it is time to take stock of what you are really doing when it comes to relationships. Be ready to change what needs to be changed and stand up for yourself. You deserve a true relationship, but you are not going to do it by repeating destructive patterns.